Sense of futility

So this is my first official contributor post and what a way to begin (sorry). I was gone for half of July and it has completely screwed up the flow & schedule I had for myself. I hoped to jump back on the wagon today and now that the day is over I don't know where it all went. I miss being in an academic environment and the focus that it allows me to have on my project. I feel my brain has turned to mush and I feel unmotivated and unfocused. I'm four hours away from school and with finances the way they are, I wasn't able to keep the small room I was renting near school for the days that I spent there. Our public libraries leave lots to be desired, the closest university is an hour away, and generally I don't do well in coffee shops. I miss university libraries, I miss conversations with other university folks (other academics?) because even if we're not speaking the same language, the conversation gets my intellectual juices flowing. I need to figure out how to re-create my writing, thinking, and focus space here in my house. This is a house that needs desperate cleaning and major yard work. I need some time at the gym. Sometimes I wish I didn't work, sometimes I wish I worked more so that our financial situation would be more secure. I hope tomorrow will be a better day and I hope I will finally return to the draft of chapter 2. What do you all do to get yourself back on track and motivated when you're heart just can't get into it?

Goals for July

Hi folks!

My goals for July are...
NOTHING!!

I'm taking the month off. I can't see why I was driving myself to finish this summer. I don't have a job to get to, none of the jobs I'm applying for require a PhD, my advisor isn't leaving the country till January, and if I delay graduating I can work at the U in the fall.

I'm still super burned out from this spring's family emergencies, and from writing nonstop all spring, so I'm taking the month to go to the beach, make pickles, and read Georgette Heyer novels. And work two jobs, yes--but at least I won't be writing. My dissertation support group (IRL) told me that I needed to choose to take the time off, rather than not doing the work and feeling bad about it. The time off would have happened, no matter what, but I feel very light and happy that I intentionally gave myself the time.

Happy summer and good luck to everyone!